My Inner French Girl hearts American women. No, really.

by Marjorie on October 28, 2009

Sometimes I forget my own darn convictions.

Kate made an astute comment in response to my post yesterday lamenting our American obsession with excess and lack of movement:

Hi,

as an introduction – I am English and I enjoy reading your site as my boyfriend is French.

I think you put yourself and your nation down too much. The fat American and the thin French woman are just stereotypes after all. ok, so apparantly 2/3 of Americans are overweight, 1/2 of British, and 1/3 of French – but that’s a difference of degree, not kind. I work in London, and plenty of people here eat breakfast at work, or at the train station. Plenty of people here are overweight and badly dressed too. I’ve never been to America, but I’m sure there’s plenty of Americans who are thin, healthy and well dressed.

don’t beat yourself up over it!

also – what is ‘dunkin’??? I don’t know this word/expression.

cheers,
Kate.

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http://www.flickr.com/photos/melissamaples/ / CC BY-NC 2.0

And she’s absolutely right. When I write reviews of books written by American writers about French women, nine times out of ten the author will inevitably make some snide, condescending remark about her (and it’s almost always a woman writer) American sisters and how fat and lazy we are. I’ve always been extremely proud of being an American and would never renounce my citizenship of this amazing country. There’s no question that, statistically, we are fat, with over 2/3 of us overweight and about a full third of us actually medically obese. Lazy? Hardly. We clock more hours at work than even the Japanese. The Japanese! Hard to believe, but it’s true. We rank among the most productive industrialized nations on earth, and okay, so our financial systems are partially responsible for running the global economy into the dust, but hey, you can’t argue that these guys didn’t work 24/7 in the process of doing just that. (And yes, that statement is intended to be tongue-in-cheek.)

I still do believe that our perspectives on health, nutrition and exercise are skewed. Surely the rise in the amount of toxins in the environment isn’t solely to blame for our alarming rates of cancer and heart disease. The French get caner and heart attacks, too, but not nearly at the rates we do (although that’s slowly and sadly starting to change for the worst). They have longer life spans and profess a better quality of life. Statistics can be manipulated to suit one’s purposes — I’ve done it, you’ve probably done it — but hard numbers are difficult to entirely dismiss.

I happily admit to being wrong, however, in not acknowledging that we American women deserve a lot of credit for all that we’ve accomplished. My Inner French Girl celebrates the beauty, strength, dignity, and grace of all women, not just the French or Europeans or Japanese, but everyone.

Your thoughts? What do you think about the tendency of some American writers to condescend to their American sisters when comparing them with their French counterparts? Do you think that the criticism is deserved? Is it balanced? Should there even be comparisons at all?

p.s. Oh, and the “Dunkin’” reference? My sincere apologies, as I also apparently forget that I have readers around the world. Mea culpa! To wit, Dunkin’ Donuts is a popular donut chain in the United States, although they also have locations around the world, including the Philippines (where I visited my first Dunkin’ as a teen). It’s not quite as delicious as a Fresh-Hot-Now Krispy Kreme original glazed, but I would never turn a Dunkin’ donut down.

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{ 6 comments }

1 Catherine October 28, 2009 at 2:20 pm

“There’s no question that, statistically, we are fat, with over 2/3 of us overweight and about a full third of us actually medically obese. ”

Hmm, I’m a bit confused about this stat. If 2/3 are overweight and 1/3 are obese that suggests that a full 3/3 are overweight at least, obese at worst, and that would be the entire population of the country. Do you mean 1/3 of that 2/3?

I think it is important to remember that what determines who is overweight, or obese, or underweight for that matter, is the BMI index. A few years back the BMI indication for “overweight” was lowered, meaning that people who had previously been deemed “healthy” were considered to become “overweight” literally over night without any change in their weight. The statistics about weight and health are misleading and the BMI index is a poor indication of health. Remember that old saying, “there are lies, damn lies and statistics”. Numbers can be manipulated too.

2 Kristine October 28, 2009 at 8:25 pm

First, let me thank you for raising this issue, as it is very timely for me and is something I am struggling with. Regarding BMI, it means nothing. I work at a prominent university with researchers whose focus is dietary fats and obesity. In a research context, BMI gives valuable information in terms of body fat. Researchers rely on physiological test(s) for this determination, not a calculation that anyone can do with data on themselves that they can easily obtain. Granted, physicians and other health care providers and advocates are hawking the BMI because they either don’t know any better or realize that there is nothing else available to the average person for such measurements.

I’m in the process of implementing some changes in my life, once such change is utilizing Mareille Guiliano’s advice from her books to change my eating habits. I’m a working single parent who rarely takes a lunch break, scarfs down breakfast, lunch and by evening is frequently too tired to do much more than snack….all….evening…long. I’m working towards cooking more (which I used to love) and taking time to just eat.

I can’t speak to other cultures or countries, but in my small Midwestern city, we are so busy to the point it interferes with community. We frequently don’t know our neighbors, much less dine with them, because they too are so terribly busy going here, there and everywhere. My boss and I were lamenting the other week that both of our workloads are beyond reasonable, everyone wanting something done impossibly fast, so tasks get done quickly but frequently only to find out that they significantly lack quality because we are not allowed the luxury of time to do it right.

How did we lose our common sense? Why is it that we are so willing to throw away our personal desires, commitment to a job well-done in order to be viewed as a Team Player (the proverbial Yes Man or Woman)? It is all linked together…all links in a chain that may eventually be our undoing. It certainly has been my undoing in that it has stressed my body, my mental health and most certainly my emotional health. I think the difference with the US is that this sort of lifestyle is frequently glamorized and respected in a very odd and seductive way. Friends passing each other on the street saying, “Hi, how are you? Keeping busy?” as if being busy makes us worthwhile. Honestly, I am much more worthwhile when I’m not busy. I’ve experienced both and I say with the strongest conviction when I’m not busy, or at least in charge enough over my schedule to say no appropriately, I am physically healthier, far less stressed, happier, and much more pleasant to be around. Just ask my daughter, she’ll tell ya!

3 Kate October 29, 2009 at 9:51 am

Hi,
I’m glad I cheered you up. You’ve had a pretty tough year, and if you get through it by running and eating pop tarts – well, it’s better than somoking, drinking to excess, taking drugs, having a nervous breakdown, or indeed only eating pop tarts and not running!

I think the key thing when you’re very busy is to be prepared. easier said than done maybe, but I keep dried fruit and nuts in my desk drawer in case I have a snack attack, then I have a healthy choice right there. It’s also possible to use convenience food and ready meals or takeaway, but just to choose healthier options.

From visiting France I know that French women also snack and eat sandwiches and ready prepared food – they just try to choose healthier options and eat smaller portions. In fact, the French people I have stayed with don’t do much cooking at all, or only very simple things. They had cold roast chicken bought ready cooked at the supermarket served with salad and crisps (potato chips to you!), pasta with canned sauce and salad, baked potatoes with mayonaise, cheese, cold meats, barbequed chicken. On special occasions they didn’t slave over the stove – they bought ready prepared food from the deli, which just needs to be cooked or reheated.

Of course this is easier in France where quality food is much cheaper than in England (probably than the USA too). Here it’s usually either quality or cheap – not both! But still, I think we can apply the lesson of choosing quick and easy food that’s a slightly healthier option, and just not eating too much.

4 Marjorie October 30, 2009 at 1:01 pm

Bonjour, Catherine! Merci mille for your comments.

You’re right, mea culpa. I meant to say that “2/3 of us are overweight, and about 1/3 of that group is considered obese.”

You’re absolutely right that the BMI numbers can be manipulated, but even you must admit that we are a much fatter and less healthy society than our predecessors were. Sure, we’re living longer, but does that necessarily translate to a better quality of life for our seniors?

Also, it’s been said that today’s generation may be the first to actually have a shorter lifespan than their parents. I’m not surprised, when you consider the rise in the number of overweight and obese children.

I think that the argument about whether or not BMI’s are appropriate measures of fat and muscle obscures the very real concern that we are not as healthy as we can and should be. When BMIs are added to other, more reliable measures of health and fitness, we still come out poorly. Think of the explosion in Type II diabetes, heart disease, stroke, and hypertension.

Salut,
Marjorie

5 Marjorie October 30, 2009 at 1:15 pm

Bonjour, Kristine!

I know from experience that BMI numbers can be used in terrible ways. When I worked for a former employer, they instituted some kind of wellness program that required all participants (it was voluntary to actually join the program) to undergo a thorough health and fitness evaluation.

Did they use doctors or otherwise qualified medical personnel? No. The company they contracted to administer the program used a volunteer paramedic to do the blood draws and BMI testing. Now, nothing against paramedics, as they’re incredible lifesavers, but just because they can stabilize you in an emergency long enough to take you to the hospital doesn’t mean they’re qualified to measure body fat, for god’s sake.

The guyhad horrible phlebotomy skills, but that’s not all. Not only did he screw up most of our blood draws (I had a five-inch bruise on my upper arm for weeks), but he also noted in my records that I had a BMI of 30. Thirty!

Now, I’m no Kate Moss, but at 5’3″ and (at the time) 125 pounds, I hardly think that my BMI wasthat high. I complained about the process to our HR director, but although they said they’d look into it, as far as I could tell our records were never changed, and we never got a re-evaluation.

On a different note, you’ve made some wonderful points about the loss of community in our modern society. It’s funny that a lot of us who live in large cities assume that middle America, especially small-town America, is much more neighborly, sort of Mayberry-like, but as you point out and as I found out when I lived in western Colorado, that’s not necessarily the case.

I’ve been working 13-14-hour days of late as my copywriting and social media business has really ramped up, and for the first time in my life I actually am super-passionate about my work. Imagine that. That helps tremendously in giving me lots of energy and drive, which is a new feeling for me as ordinarily I tend to feel quite run-down and dreary when I don’t get enough sleep, but now I understand a little of my friends who love their jobs used to say when they said that they didn’t mind the workload at all.

And yet…I know that this isn’t a sustainable habit, and when I look at the mirror every morning after waking up, I see a face all puffy from lack of sleep and eyes rimmed red and swollen. Sigh.

I am trying to make some changes in my life, including getting to know my neighbors better and taking more time to visit with family and friends, many of whom are a good half-hour or more drive away. Those of you who’ve lived in apartment complexes know well how difficult it is to get to know one’s neighbors, transients that we are, but then again, isn’t our entire society very mobile anyway? Might as well make even the few months or years we share a hallway together be a pleasurable and friendly one. We can make community wherever we go.

I hope you can soon find a solution to your work stresses! I agree that we do take too much pride in working too hard and being busy for the sake of being busy. I don’t know if we’ll ever change that part of the American character, but I hope that some of us can at least resist the tide in our own lives.

Do you think that things will ease up at work anytime soon? Or do you expect it to continue indefinitely?

Salut,
Marjorie

6 Marjorie October 30, 2009 at 1:19 pm

Dearest Kate, yes, indeed, you cheered me up tremendously. Merci mille!

I totally agree that preparation is key to healthy habits, both physically and gastronomically! I think that so many of us are so accustomed to simply reacting to things and allowing life’s circumstances to overwhelm us that we don’t take the time to step back, say Whoa, and take control over our time.

It’s hard to break a habit like that, but I’m working on it. I went to Whole Foods the other day and bought more prepared foods like frozen veggies (much healthier than canned, or even fresh ones that took weeks to be trucked to the local store!) and fish. I’ve been a cook-from-scratch person for so long that it’s almost a visceral rejection when I reach for a box of organic peas, but I have to remind myself that it’s either this, or I wolf down a bag of Wendy’s fries and cheeseburger because I didn’t plan well.

I’m so glad you mentioned French women’s snacking habits. I had heard much the same thing, and even Madame Barone mentions it, but sometimes all the hoopla about fresh this and fresh that in Paris obscures the day-to-day reality of the modern French woman.

Merci mille again for your lovely comments!

Salut,
Marjorie

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